Heart Attack...

TUESDAY, JULY 13, 2010
8:00 PM

(continued from June 24, 2010)

You’ve got to love my Aunt Betty and Uncle Curt. They were at the hospital in record time and of course Uncle Curt had jokes. They informed that they saw Jacqui on their way in and talk to her a little while. My sister really loves me. Though we don’t say the magic three words, “I love you”, very often. She displays her affection differently and has always been there when I needed her. Her love is displayed materialistically. Especially during Christmas time. That’s where collection of over night bags came from and she always kept me in cologne. I must say the girl knows her fragrances and what would smell good on her brother. I’m also a benefactor of her designer casual wear that she out grew. She loves Fordham Road and I know in a couple of years the accoutrements will be mine. I’ll take the hand me downs any day and where them well.


Tuesday, May 11, 2010 I made it through the night and it was time to move me to the heart attack unit in Ellis Hospital. I felt good and was hungry. That’s a good sign. The nutritionist came by with the menu. Yes, a menu. Not a slip of paper where you would normally circle the items for breakfast, lunch and dinner. This was a restaurant style menu. Yeah boi! The nutritionist took my order on an electronic gismo of sorts, but I every time I picked something from the menu like the Philly Cheese Steak, she would say the gismo said I can not have it. What! That’s crazy.

Apparently, my records and diet were programmed. I was on a low salt, cholesterol, and fat diet. That was news to me. All the good stuff I could no longer have. Wow! No more Popeye’s, McDonald’s, Burger King, or Wendy’s. My pig-out stations were off limits. Good-bye mild chicken breast and wings with a side of Cajun rice and macaroni and cheese. Adios Southern Style Chicken sandwich, ten piece chicken nugget and a filet-o-fish with ketchup, no tarter. Au revoir Bacon Double Cheeseburger and onion rings. Arrivederci Baconator, and Chicken BLT salad with two honey mustard dressings. “Those were the days”, when I could just pig away. I have to erase Domino’s and Pizza Hut from my speed dial and get rid of the coupons. Talk about life-style change! I have to learn how to cook. Now I see why Joyce had me cooking different things for dinner and shopping for roasts. Yeah, she knew her boy was clueless in the kitchen. She would marvel at how I could go into Price Chopper and be out in less than fifteen minutes. I called it speed shopping. Go with a list. Stick to the list. Know the layout of the land and do not stray off the path. I still shop like that but now I have different stores for certain things and most of the items are in the perimeter of the stores: Fruits, vegetables, fish, seafood, lean meat, skinless chicken cutlets thinly sliced, juice, whole wheat or whole grain bread, and egg whites.

After lunch Dr. Holmes stopped by and gave me the prognosis. My right coronary artery (RCA) was completely clogged and a stint was placed in to open it up. I would have to remain in the hospital until Thursday. Happy Birthday to me! Well at least I’ll be resting. Suddenly I felt alone in the world. In the past I had my mother to call from the hospital and we would spend hours on the phone. Now, who was I going to call? What does a mama’s boy do without his mama? He cries. A rush of sadness came over me. The reality that she is really gone sank in and my heart began to ache. Literally, I could feel the stint trying to settle into the artery. I wasn’t losing my mind. I knew this was merely psychological but it still hurt. I derailed myself from the path of gloom and despair and began texting my friend Chad. Wednesday was our birthday and I knew if I reached out to him he would understand where I was and needed someone to help me through. Generally the bull, Taurus, will withdraw from the world and go to a place of solitude to handle his problems by internalizing them. It’s not very often that a Taurus will reach out for someone. Chad understood this. When I text him and requested he come visit me. He knew somewhat immediately that I was hurting, especially when my responses to his questions became short and curt. My final text to him was “get here!” When I texted my BFF, Sheilah. She called me immediately and asked permission to inform my fellow cast members from “No Earthly Good”, a play I was in the Friday before the heart attack.Uncle Curt charged into the room with Aunt Betty following behind. Once she cleared the equipment and got good look at me the worry on her face dissipated. Of course I had to indicate that I was fine. “Then why are you in here”, was Uncle Curt’s response. The jester always cracks me up. Jeff and Woody, my cousins, must have had a great time growing up. I provided them with their copy of the Health Care Proxy/Living Will to look over and stressed that Jacqui may not be able to handle the decisions that may be required. Especially, since I have a DNR. Curt was familiar with the paper work and scrutinized it with a fine tooth comb. He also knew that they needed to have the papers on them whenever I was hospitalized. We all hope that I would not be in the hospital again, but the reality is that with my track record I would be in the hospital every three to five years or so. Of course this in unbeknownst to them. They stayed for a little while. We laughed a lot together at my delusion of pneumonia and they could see that I was in good spirits before they left. The rest of the evening was mine and at some point I drifted off to sleep. I had a long day and I guess I must have been tired or still feeling the effects of the anesthesia.